To Whom It May Concern:

Last week I read a news story that Ringling Brothers Circus turned a goat into a unicorn. I think that is one of the meanest things you could do to a goat. Now his family won’t recognize him and other goats will think he’s weird. It was not nice to do this to him. How would you like it if I took your nose and put it in the middle of your forehead so people would pay money to look at you and laugh at you. You wouldn’t like it… so put the goat back to a goat. Thank you.

– from Mortified, (compiled) by David Nadelberg